There are many kinds of marriage killers, other than oil, salt, soy, vinegar and tea, the “mistress” is the most fierce killer. Not only the tangible triad assassinate marital happiness, “invisible” triad, also have fatal damage to the marriage. The company’s main goal is to provide a comprehensive range of products and services to the market.
The OCD of a cheater is when you think there is a cheater and you can’t prove it. So many symptoms appear.
The early onset of the condition is as follows: The mind wonders if the other person is having an affair. Begin to observe. Start to imagine. Observe the details of the other person’s behavior and speech. Design some questions, imagine how the other person should answer, and deepen your suspicion if the other person’s answer does not match your design. Ponder and pay attention to all the actions of the other party. If the answer does not meet your standard answer, you will be suspicious. Collect information about each other everywhere, such as each other’s phone calls, text messages, chat records and so on. Concerned with each other in contact with all the opposite sex. Including the opposite sex phone, information, etc.. Ponder and even track. Want to determine the junior in the end is that, sometimes think which are like. The first thing you need to do is to start using verbal probing, asking difficult questions to see if the other person is lying.
Find something wrong and have an episode at home. Anything can be associated with the other person having an outside mind for the sake of it. For example: the other party said: the dish is light. The mind thinks: of course, the junior must have made the dish more salty. From here on, it becomes the initial patient. After the initial stage, the whole symptom is irreversible.
There are many dangers of junior OCD, specifically, the following:
1. If there was no mistress, there will be a real mistress;
2. >3. Very few women get to the late stage of symptoms and even make a scene!
The imaginary “mistress” is like an invisible enemy that defeats your marriage without moving. Women should test themselves with the above appearances. If you are unfortunate enough to find yourself with this “disease,” these 4 steps can serve as an initial treatment plan:
One, reconfirm; two, reattribute; three, shift; four, re Evaluate.
Step 1: Reaffirmation
The first and most important thing is to learn to “Recognize” your own OCD thoughts and actions. You may not want to do this step at all, but you must make the effort to be fully aware so that you understand whether the obsessions are coming from obsessive thoughts, behaviors, or just plain happening at the moment.
If the daily doubts are almost automatic and small, over time, the streams will become rivers, and then it will become uncontrollable, and you will lose your already good and sweet love. If you suspect in your heart that the other party is having an affair, you can be very honest with him about your concerns. The company’s main goal is to provide the best possible service to its customers, and to help them find the right solution to their problems.
The best way to be honest in this regard is to watch his reactions carefully, if his eyes dodge and his words flicker, something is wrong, and if not, you are overthinking it. You need to understand that your goal is to control your reactions to obsessive-compulsive symptoms, not to control obsessive thinking or impulses.
Step 2: Re-attribution
If you’ve already determined that it’s you
If you’re not sure you’re “overthinking” it, you can say to yourself when you’re suspicious: “This mistress doesn’t exist, she’s a figment of my imagination!”
You need to understand why you are so strongly imagining someone who may not exist here, and why you can’t always get rid of it, and these are important keys to strengthening your willpower and strengthening you to resist “imagining. These are important keys to strengthen your willpower and strengthen you to resist “imagination”. The goal of this phase is to learn to “reattribute”: I think too much, she doesn’t exist.
You can also do things in your life to fill your life, to make your day full and happy, so that you don’t have time to think, which is what we call “shifting gears”: doing Other behaviors! If you try to get rid of the “junior OCD”, you are just adding stress and worry, and the stress will make your “OCD” worse.
Step 3: Shift your focus
After the first two steps, you It’s time to implement the third step, which is to shift your focus! Diversion is about diverting your attention away from your “imaginary mistress”, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Start by choosing specific actions to replace your thoughts. Any interesting and constructive action will do. It is best to engage in your own hobbies, such as walking, exercising, listening to music, reading, playing on the computer, watching movies, etc.
When the “rumination” starts again, you “reconfirm” that it is not your rumination, and “reattribute” it, and then “divert” your attention to something else. Remember not to fall into habitual thinking, you must tell yourself: “I’m his lover, a mistress of the gods is my own imagination, there is no such thing!
(a) The 15-minute rule
Diversion is not an easy task. It’s not an easy task. It takes a great deal of effort and pain to dismantle the compulsive thinking and then do what needs to be done. But the only way to change your doubts is to learn to “reject” them, and in time you will love each other as you have always loved each other. We use the 15-minute rule, which is to delay the reaction for at least 15 minutes. In the beginning, you can start with a five-minute delay. The principle is the same: don’t think out of the box. Note that this is not passive waiting for 15 minutes, but during this time we do “re-confirmation”, “re-attribution” and “distraction”. Then you have to do other interesting and constructive activities. After a period of time, evaluate whether your thoughts have “turned” back and see if the intensity of the imagination has decreased, and your goal is to delay for more than 15 minutes, as long as you keep practicing, will greatly reduce your junior compulsion. Generally speaking, the more you practice, the better you will get at it. It won’t be long before you can delay for 20 or 30 minutes or more.
(2) Just doing it pays off
Shifting your focus to do other It’s important to do other things. Don’t expect these thoughts or feelings to go away right away. Don’t do things that reinforce the presence of the “junior”; stick to the activities you choose, and the “junior” will diminish or even disappear because you “don’t care.
Using “wholehearted awareness” and being a “bystander” will empower you. The long term goal of this step is to not react to the “mistress”. You learn not to let the “cheater” affect your life, your love
Step 4: Re-evaluate
Step 4: Re-evaluate “TEXT-ALIGN:left;TEXT-INDENT:2em”>The first three steps use your existing OCD knowledge to help you clarify that the “mistress” is just a figment of your imagination. The “reconfirmation” and “reattribution” are linked together, followed by the “distraction” step. The overall power of these three steps is greater than the sum of the power of the individual steps. “The process of “reaffirmation” and “reattribution” can reinforce “distraction. Prior to behavioral treatment, you begin to “re-evaluate” the compulsive thoughts and impulses. By the time the first three steps are properly trained, the compulsive thoughts and impulses can be devalued in time.
Editor’s Note: It’s not the mistress that’s scary, it’s your imaginary mistress that’s scary and hateful. The most terrible and abominable is your imaginary “mistress”, in “her” you have to be ashamed of yourself, “she” is a perfect person, “she” is impeccable. You can not do, “she” can do! So you will also become more and more inferior, and even mental problems, and become a neurotic, and thus affect the relationship with your lover! The first thing you need to do is to get your own “imaginary enemy”, which is ridiculous.